Monday, March 27, 2017

Nap Time is the Best Time

Last Friday I had my quarterly endocrinologist appointment. As I was sitting in the stark room and engaging in sterile conversation I realized that I was just tired of it. I was tired of justifying all the insulin pump inputs and continuous glucose monitor trends. I was tired of explaining my daily routine, again. Or how I sometimes work nights which throws a wrench in the readings. I was tired of wasting time and pretending to be cordial just to get a refill on my prescriptions and an A1c test. It was Friday, the end of a long week, and my heart just wanted to fly home and snuggle with the best thing this Type 1 Diabetic body has ever created:

Nap time is the best time!

Type 1 Diabetes is an exhausting disease. It permeates almost every daily activity - even putting pants on and carefully trying to avoid the continuous glucose sensor stuck to my leg can be a reminder that its been almost 19 years with no days off. Physically, my fingers are callused and my arms are marked with left over insulin pump scabs. Logistically, my bank account has withdrawals to pay for insulin and durable goods, and my calendar has Diabetes appointments on the regular. Emotionally, I'm fragile when my pump comes between my daughter and I, and I hate that a low blood sugar can interrupt my ability to care for my child.

Lately I have just been so tired of it.
There are so many things I would rather be tired from!

Even a nap from Diabetes would do at this point :-)

I'm sure these feelings will pass shortly - I'll be back to my old spreadsheet-loving self in no time. But I'm just here to say that life isn't all rainbows and unicorns, sometimes it's frustrating and dreary.

Anyone else out there with a bad case of Diabetes burnout?