Skip to main content

Commitment

I guess today's letter is "C"...although it hardly stands for "Cookie." 

These last few days have been hard, and I'm not sure why. I have had a hard time finding the motivation to do anything productive, much less blog. I have been down about the 'betes, stressed about school and work, cleaning like a mad woman, and discussing our conflicting plans for Thanksgiving and Christmas with the BF. I have let my commitment of blogging everyday in November slide, but not without guilt. Ironically, I have been contemplating this whole idea of commitment a lot lately. 

My parents always preached, "Don't commit to something unless you can do it 100 percent." I believe in their logic, and I try to practice it in my everyday life. Recently I had to turn down a slot in the Heritage Ringers (a community handbell choir here in Huntsville...by audition only) because I knew I could not commit 100% with my semi-crazy work schedule. I have also temporarily quit the Huntsville Concert Band in an attempt to spend a couple hours with the BF (he has been pulling late nights at school lately). And while I am able to chose and prioritize these commitments, there is one commitment I have no say in: Type 1 Diabetes. Unfortunately, he is always claiming that top priority slot, and many times pushes out other, more enjoyable commitments. He's kinda selfish. Sometimes just managing him takes so much energy that there just isn't any left for bell ringin' and clarinet blowin'. Not only that, but he takes energy away from family time, social time and the BF time. All this without even giving me a choice...just "wam-bam-thankyoumam-slapintheface" YOU GOT DIABEETUS. 

Honestly, Diabetes, it is hard for me to give you 100%, and that's ok. I didn't chose you, I didn't "commit" to you. But now, you have forced me to commit, to take care of myself, to watch over you like a child, to entertain you and feed your demands.

But its ok. My parents may have said that stuff about "commitment...100%...blahblahblah" ...but I focus more on the "One day at a time." I try my best. I give it my all, and some days it's just not 100%.

Comments

  1. Oh April, I totally understand! There are so many things I would like to do like scrapbooking, playing volleyball, or decorating my house more. But between work, cleaning the house, and cooking I have MAYBE an hour of free time everyday. It totally sucks being an adult sometimes. Then there's that annoying 'betes. Always demanding our time. Hang in there! I'd rather fully commit to a few things than halfway to a bunch of things.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Let me help you with deciding for the holidays... Come Home!! WE miss you and would love to see you again.

    I know it sounds so much more simple than it is, but that is my vote.

    Denise

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Who has two thumbs and loves comments? Nerdy April!!! Type one out and hit publish!

Popular posts from this blog

The road to curing Type 1 Diabetes

From the moment of diagnosis, the road is rough, the learning curve is steep and the stakes are literally life or death. The map is less-than-helpful - paths originating from virtually every corner, coalescing at a center point (aka "diagnosis") and bursting back outwards - some paths cross and wrap around each other but others are isolated. And even with all of these roads, most of the territory is uncharted - how did we all get here and how will we all exit? Where are the obstacles we haven't found yet? Which passage holds the key to unlocking the solution?

On any given day I feel pretty isolated with this disease - I'm the only T1D in my group at work, the only one in mission control, the only one in my family. I go through the logistics of calling insurance companies, ordering supplies, changing sites and troubleshooting malfunctions mostly on my own. Even those pesky carbs really only get counted in my brain, no group think for a meal bolus here. But there is b…

International Travel with Type 1 Diabetes

Whew! Back from one international trip and on to another next week! I will admit my eyes roll every time I get the "we're gunna need to pat you down" talk at TSA, but international travel is a whole different animal. I thought it might be fun to see what goes through my brain and into my bags for these types of trips!


I wouldn't be a NASA Flight Controller if I wasn't good at planning, the key to international travel as a T1D is PLANNING!

3 months prior

Assess supplies. Mine come in 90-days supplies so I like to inventory at least 3 months prior and make a plan to order more early if the trip is going to coincide with the end of my 90-day stock. In my experience supply companies are usually pretty good about adjusting orders as needed if you tell them the reason for the early request - just mention you have an international trip coming up and want to make sure to have plenty of supplies (and backups!) in time. Request a loaner insulin pump. It's likely the comp…

Hot OJT

Last week I had the chance to mentor a newly certified ADCO trainee - the NASA process is called "Hot On-The-Job-Training", or Hot OJT. What makes it "hot" you ask? Well, essentially I am hands off - he is sitting at the console, working all the plan reviews and updates, making calls to other flight controllers and to the flight director, reacting to anomalies and preparing material for the shift handover. My job is to act as the fault tolerance - a backup ADCO of sorts.

Tuesday was his last official day and by Wednesday morning he was in the backroom sending commands to ISS in preparation for the docking of a three-person Soyuz.


The beauty of this system is the gradual buildup in responsibility. There is a subtle shift from student, to subject matter expert, to fresh operations trainee to advanced trainee and finally to certification and real-time operations flight controller - the process takes two years on average and is considered by many to be enough specializ…
01 09 10